Deek Jackson : Michael Jackson Still Dead Fkn Newz 2nd July 09

MICHAEL JACKSON STILL DEAD

Major offensive in Afghanistan offends many, as US

troops withdraw from Iraq.

Experts say Michael jacksons is still dead and left all

his debts to his children.

US jobless figures worst than expected many people still

working.

Fiscal emergency in California Arnold Schwarzenegger

cant count.

World condemns leaders of banana repulics, business

writes them a cheque.

In the uk Great train robber biggs refused parole cos

hes still a bit cocky…

Hello economic slaves welcome to the fkn newz , im

hardly breathing here are the headlies tonight..
The US army says it has launched a major offensive

against the Taliban in south Afghanistan’s Helmand

province. about 4,000 marines as well as 650 Afghan

troops are involved, supported by Nato planes.A Taliban

spokesman said … were very offended by the offensive,

your still killing us because we didnt hand over Osama

bin laden ? for fucks sake you people really hold a

grudge dont you, geez give it up that was a long time

ago, dont you have other things to do, it s not like we

all attacked you is it , so our leader at the time was

an asshole, yours was too, but were not holding it

against you , . in a totally related story , Six years

after the lies about WMD led to the invasion of Iraq and

the assassination er toppling of Saddam Hussein, Iraqi

troops are assuming control of their own insecurity as

US combat forces withdraw from urban centers to camps

just up the road a bit. In Iraq commentators are

optimistic that Iraqis will manage to be bombed to death

by warring ethnic and religious factions without a US

presence but warned of other challenges to security,

without metioning the CIA blowing things up and blaming

it on Iran. Security duties have formally been handed

over to new Iraqi forces. A public holiday has been

declared, and the capital, Baghdad, held a giant party

to mark the eve of the changeover. Despite the pullback,

US troops will still occupy er be embedded in Iraqi.

Moron that story later

Much of the worlds news for the last week has been

dedicated hahah, to the fact that Michael jackson is

still dead, many experts in death have stated that he

will remain dead and that resurrection is extremely

unlikely unless it turns out he is either the Antichrist

or the second coming.. In his will which has been filed

in a Los Angeles court, he leaves his entire debt to his

family .The singer who died last week also stipulates

his body is to be melted down and turned into toys, so

children can play with him for a change. Meanwhile,

figures show Jackson had the three top-selling US albums

last week - each shifting more than 100,000 copies.
His record campany is said to be overjoyed er i mean

devestated by his death…

In other news ..The number of jobs lost in the US last

month came in at 467,000, which was much lower than had

been expected. Since the start of the recession in

December 2007, the number of jobless people has risen by

7.2 million, the Department of Labor went on not to say,

“The job market is terrible. It’s as bad as we’ve seen

in our lifetime,” but its not going to be enough if we

want to save the planet , I m calling on all gainfully

employed people to give unemployment a chance , just try

it for a while, think of the trees youll be saving , the

melting ice caps youll protect, “The light at the end of

tunnel is that the recession may be longer and deeper

than predicted ” but dont wait for it , go home now,

stop working , stop shopping and everything will be much

better much sooner
The governor of California has declared a fiscal

emergency in the US state to address a budget deficit of

some $24.3bn (£14.5bn). California has been one of the

US states hardest hit by the recession.The moves comes

after state legislators missed a 1 July deadline to

approve a budget for the coming financial year.
Many people claim Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger caused

The emergency because he cant count. These stories are

outrageous I have a large staff of very clever people

who count for me, also i can count with the help of my

fingers..one two 3 4 5 once i cought a fish alive

6…7….er well come back to that story later

Leaders of banana republics have tried many ways to hang

on to power over the years coups, rigged elections,

military force and others , now it seems other countries

apart from America are getting in on the act..The newly

installed government in Honduras has rejected

international calls to restore ousted President Manuel

Zelaya to power. Elections in Guinea-Bissau to replace

assassinated President Joao Bernardo Vieira are to go to

a second round, and Niger’s President Mamadou Tandja has

undermined a decade of good government in his attempts

to stay in power beyond the legal limit by dissolving

the constitutional court and parliament in his bid for a

third term. While democratic government s decry this

behavior and publicly distance themselves from the

regimes, western corporations enjoy nothing more than

writing big cheques to these tinpot dictators securing

Nigeria oil reserves for peanuts, Honduran tax havens

for a song and a handy trans europe drug port in

Guinea-Bissauf for CIA er i mean organized crimes cocain

shipments

Great Train Robber Ronnie Biggs is set to die in jail er

I mean appeal against the government’s decision to

refuse him parole. Justice Secretary Jack Straw rejected

a recommendation by the Parole Board which backed the

release of Biggs, 79. Mr Straw said biggs had flouted

the authority of the school er country , Biggs had

chosen not to obey the rules er law and tried to avoid

the consequences of his decision. In announcing his

decision on Wednesday, he said: mp’s fiddling millions

of pounds in expenses is nothing like a group of people

pinching someone elses money , im more than happy for

mp’s to get of scot free for being thieving scum while i

use this old robber for political capital ..Mr biggs who

cannot speak , move, eat, swallow , or walk as a result

of several strokes , didnt say fuck of your hypocritical

tosser..

Thanks and now the weather

A heatwave in the UK has failed to kill many people tho

The Met Office has raised its heatwave alert level as

hot and humid conditions look set to continue until

Friday it has cautioned people not to expect it to last

or to herald the end of the world as we know it thro

rising sea levels and catastrophic drought..have a nice

weekend

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